Mission get Foxy For Florida has started!
So, I am still carrying far too much 'spare' weight around for my liking, due to basically my lack of self control! I love my food and my wine and quite honestly any excuse for a get together or a party and it is apalling news for my waistline.. it is now time to get tough, my bessie Kaz is getting married in Florida on the 14th April and we are spending two weeks out there, wearing minimal clothing so quite frankly I need to do something about my sad sack of a body. OK, in clothes I don't look too bad but zoikes, I do not like my naked self one bit and enough is enough. I can't blame post baby bod either, I am lucky with my genes - nope, no one to blame but me! Good news is that I know I can do it, I have willpower of steel when I put my mind to it, the only thing that I will find v tough is giving up the wine, but the image of me in a bikini as I look now is enough motivation :)
Firstly - I need to start running again, I have blamed my lack of exercising on the weather but I am blatantly too lazy (well what would you rather do, strap on a sports bra and a pair of Nikes and head out in to the freezing January day or curl up on the sofa with Grazia magazine? Exactly) I also need to rein in my eating and drinking, Kev and I have started the year really well with our alcohol free days we have made some spectacular leaps off the wagon too.. Today marks day one of my detox, I am doing that for 3 days and am then going to follow a small portion diet plan, I CBA with no carb, endless salads, brown rice etc so I am just going to eat ballerina sized portions of normal food, drink gallons of water and see how I go. I have been on my thigh trainer too today and will go for a run tomorrow am as soon as I have dropped Zoom at nursery, just before I start work and I am aiming to get back to running 3 x per week and thigh training a further few.
Weekends I will be less strict with myself, hell I know I will fail if I set myself too strict a regime! I want 10 lbs off by end of Feb, and a total loss of 1.5 stone by the time April rocks around.
Wish me luck, so far I have had water water and water and I am feeling good.. long may it last..
Monday, January 31, 2011
Tuesday, October 19, 2010
My Black Wednesday
It all started in 1993, September, just as I started back at school for the new year. I was 14. My first stop on the way to my first day was the stables, my favourite sanctuary. As I rounded the corner and through the little wooden gate a dark flash shot across the field ahead - I looked closer and there she was - standing bolt upright and snorting wildly, the mad crazy bay Arab mare who would become the love of my life, my best friend, my soul mate and the one who knew everything there was to know about me. It was love at first sight, and I would like to think that the feeling was mutual, even if she was wicked to me on occasions! Dusty was unique, she was wild and crazy and no one else's choice of mount apart from mine. She was as fine as spun sugar and as strong as an Ox and she gave you a look as if to say, 'you just stay on your toes lady!' she was a stunning bright pale conker colour, with a shock of black mane and tail and she had the most amazing white markings, two symmetrical white back legs, flecks on her flanks and incredible white stripes across her tail, as if she had leant against a fence covered in flour! Her face was the most beautiful thing I have ever seen, beautifully dished with a startling white blaze that ran right to her lip. She had a tiny whorl behind her ear which she very rarely let me touch, she HATED her ears being touched, in fact that was one of the ways that we could tell if she was feeling poorly, she let us touch her ears. Dusty was incredibly fast, she could gallop and would outrun everyone, always - she was bold and jumped like a little stag, although was often a little too excitable for me to actually do a clear round!
For the next 4 years I looked after her day in day out, we rode as often as possible both up and down the cumbrian fells and all around the the surrounding villages. We jumped (terrifying on occasions!) and we schooled, we galloped and we explored, we spent so much time together. Indeed she threw me and fell backwards on top of me the week before my A Levels - that was not so fun! It broke my heart when I found it near impossible to ride her when I was almost crippled with arthritis, but I had a go, and she looked after me then, it was as though she knew.
When I finally left school, the summer holidays and the prospect of not having my pony with me were too much, so Nellie (head of riding at my school) agreed to sell her to me for £700 - so I worked all summer at the Naafi and in the Officers' Mess and when I finally sent Nellie the cheque I was elated! A week later, clattering off the back of a lorry in not so much as a brushing boot for protection, my darling arrived at our new home, where I would be working as a working pupil for the next year. Quite how I managed to keep us both on my salary of £35 a week I will never know, but we had a fantastic time, we hunted for the first time, and I insisted on doing so in a snaffle as she wouldn't accept a stronger bit - much to the amusement of my colleagues - especially when my dog hating horse saw the hounds released for the first time, we nearly went in to orbit! Her stable was just over the corridor from my dorm, and we shared everything from crips sandwiches to easter eggs..
Then as we both got older we moved yards together, bringing Ladybird with us - my Mum's horse who became Dusty's equine soul mate. We then had a riot of mad hacking, jumping, photoshoots (Dusty was made famous in Good Housekeeping in 1998 I think it was!) lessons for my Mum, local shows - oh the disasters, even a lovely sharer for her, Sammy who helped me out when work got too much.
Dusty was such a brave horse, prone to colic which gave us great cause for concern on many occasion - and had a heart murmur which never seemed to bother her! She acted like a filly her whole life, and age would not weary her, not at all. No one ever believed me when I told them she was born in 1981, the year before my sister! She suffered her fair share of dramatic injuries too, she was attacked in the field and did severe damage to her leg in 2001, but I nursed her back, she even got horrendously kicked in October last year and fractured her leg - but we fixed her then too (although we then retired her from being ridden, much to her delight!) it was tough but she was a fighter.
On Wednesday 29th September 2010 I received a call from my Mum, it was 8.30 am and she wanted me to come down to the yard straight away to see Dusty, she said that she was having trouble walking. As I put down my phone, I knew, I had had a terrible dream two nights before and I felt the horror rising up inside me that my worst fear was coming true.
I got to the field within minutes and as I saw my beautiful girl trying to walk towards me the pain ripped through me like a knife. Her back end was failing, her legs weren't supporting her body and they were contorting horribly with every step she tried to take. I called the vet immediately. Dietrich was with us within half an hour. Dusty had spinal trauma, most likely a tumour and nothing was going to fix her this time, no open ended credit card, no medicine, nothing would. The feeling of helplessness was overwhelming, I sobbed and sobbed as I gave the consent to send my best friend to sleep for the last time. We had to sedate Ladybird to keep her calm whilst we said goodbye. So, I buried my face in her lovely wild mane and told her I was sorry, that I loved her so very much and that I had to say goodbye. Dusty fell peacefully to sleep at 11am, and with her, a piece of me died too.
It is the hardest thing now knowing she isn't here any more, that I wont see her face when I return to our field. Dusty was always there, she listened to all my dilemmas, my thoughts, my hopes, dreams and secrets - that horse took many secrets to her grave. She always listened, never judged and always gave such a lot back. She saw me grow up, fall in and out of love and back again, do my work, have my children (whom she wasn't always overly keen on!) and she even let Teya on her back on a couple of occasions, but never for very long!! Despite the fact that she was nearly 30, and I knew she wouldn't last forever, the shock is still severe.
So, goodnight Pony, thank you for the past 18 years of unconditional love, and for all the joy that you brought to me and my family. We will miss you everyday. I am so very grateful that you didn't have to suffer, that you had no long term illness that was causing you pain. I am glad that you were able to live your life to the full in your fab 8 acre field, right up until the end. Take care up there, I treasure each and every thought of you.
It all started in 1993, September, just as I started back at school for the new year. I was 14. My first stop on the way to my first day was the stables, my favourite sanctuary. As I rounded the corner and through the little wooden gate a dark flash shot across the field ahead - I looked closer and there she was - standing bolt upright and snorting wildly, the mad crazy bay Arab mare who would become the love of my life, my best friend, my soul mate and the one who knew everything there was to know about me. It was love at first sight, and I would like to think that the feeling was mutual, even if she was wicked to me on occasions! Dusty was unique, she was wild and crazy and no one else's choice of mount apart from mine. She was as fine as spun sugar and as strong as an Ox and she gave you a look as if to say, 'you just stay on your toes lady!' she was a stunning bright pale conker colour, with a shock of black mane and tail and she had the most amazing white markings, two symmetrical white back legs, flecks on her flanks and incredible white stripes across her tail, as if she had leant against a fence covered in flour! Her face was the most beautiful thing I have ever seen, beautifully dished with a startling white blaze that ran right to her lip. She had a tiny whorl behind her ear which she very rarely let me touch, she HATED her ears being touched, in fact that was one of the ways that we could tell if she was feeling poorly, she let us touch her ears. Dusty was incredibly fast, she could gallop and would outrun everyone, always - she was bold and jumped like a little stag, although was often a little too excitable for me to actually do a clear round!
For the next 4 years I looked after her day in day out, we rode as often as possible both up and down the cumbrian fells and all around the the surrounding villages. We jumped (terrifying on occasions!) and we schooled, we galloped and we explored, we spent so much time together. Indeed she threw me and fell backwards on top of me the week before my A Levels - that was not so fun! It broke my heart when I found it near impossible to ride her when I was almost crippled with arthritis, but I had a go, and she looked after me then, it was as though she knew.
When I finally left school, the summer holidays and the prospect of not having my pony with me were too much, so Nellie (head of riding at my school) agreed to sell her to me for £700 - so I worked all summer at the Naafi and in the Officers' Mess and when I finally sent Nellie the cheque I was elated! A week later, clattering off the back of a lorry in not so much as a brushing boot for protection, my darling arrived at our new home, where I would be working as a working pupil for the next year. Quite how I managed to keep us both on my salary of £35 a week I will never know, but we had a fantastic time, we hunted for the first time, and I insisted on doing so in a snaffle as she wouldn't accept a stronger bit - much to the amusement of my colleagues - especially when my dog hating horse saw the hounds released for the first time, we nearly went in to orbit! Her stable was just over the corridor from my dorm, and we shared everything from crips sandwiches to easter eggs..
Then as we both got older we moved yards together, bringing Ladybird with us - my Mum's horse who became Dusty's equine soul mate. We then had a riot of mad hacking, jumping, photoshoots (Dusty was made famous in Good Housekeeping in 1998 I think it was!) lessons for my Mum, local shows - oh the disasters, even a lovely sharer for her, Sammy who helped me out when work got too much.
Dusty was such a brave horse, prone to colic which gave us great cause for concern on many occasion - and had a heart murmur which never seemed to bother her! She acted like a filly her whole life, and age would not weary her, not at all. No one ever believed me when I told them she was born in 1981, the year before my sister! She suffered her fair share of dramatic injuries too, she was attacked in the field and did severe damage to her leg in 2001, but I nursed her back, she even got horrendously kicked in October last year and fractured her leg - but we fixed her then too (although we then retired her from being ridden, much to her delight!) it was tough but she was a fighter.
On Wednesday 29th September 2010 I received a call from my Mum, it was 8.30 am and she wanted me to come down to the yard straight away to see Dusty, she said that she was having trouble walking. As I put down my phone, I knew, I had had a terrible dream two nights before and I felt the horror rising up inside me that my worst fear was coming true.
I got to the field within minutes and as I saw my beautiful girl trying to walk towards me the pain ripped through me like a knife. Her back end was failing, her legs weren't supporting her body and they were contorting horribly with every step she tried to take. I called the vet immediately. Dietrich was with us within half an hour. Dusty had spinal trauma, most likely a tumour and nothing was going to fix her this time, no open ended credit card, no medicine, nothing would. The feeling of helplessness was overwhelming, I sobbed and sobbed as I gave the consent to send my best friend to sleep for the last time. We had to sedate Ladybird to keep her calm whilst we said goodbye. So, I buried my face in her lovely wild mane and told her I was sorry, that I loved her so very much and that I had to say goodbye. Dusty fell peacefully to sleep at 11am, and with her, a piece of me died too.
It is the hardest thing now knowing she isn't here any more, that I wont see her face when I return to our field. Dusty was always there, she listened to all my dilemmas, my thoughts, my hopes, dreams and secrets - that horse took many secrets to her grave. She always listened, never judged and always gave such a lot back. She saw me grow up, fall in and out of love and back again, do my work, have my children (whom she wasn't always overly keen on!) and she even let Teya on her back on a couple of occasions, but never for very long!! Despite the fact that she was nearly 30, and I knew she wouldn't last forever, the shock is still severe.
So, goodnight Pony, thank you for the past 18 years of unconditional love, and for all the joy that you brought to me and my family. We will miss you everyday. I am so very grateful that you didn't have to suffer, that you had no long term illness that was causing you pain. I am glad that you were able to live your life to the full in your fab 8 acre field, right up until the end. Take care up there, I treasure each and every thought of you.
Wednesday, January 13, 2010
OK crikey this is a late one but Happy New Year all! This is a rubbish rubbish late update but oh my what a Christmas period we had... madly busy but wonderful, the house was full daily of love, fun and laughter and it was great to have everyone around all over the holidays. I was absolutely shattered by the time my sis and nephew left mind you and was very glad to be snowed in for a few days to catch up on some QT with the Spuddy and just chill out and make snowmen, feed the birds and venture round the corner to the pub with Janet and her kiddies! Fun times, the village is beautiful in the snow..
BUT.. day 10 of it means that I am feeling a little bored of not being able to venture out, so would like the big thaw now - just to keep me from housework and internet shopping whilst the Zed Head (my baby who now has 7 teeth!!!!) is sleeping...
BUT.. day 10 of it means that I am feeling a little bored of not being able to venture out, so would like the big thaw now - just to keep me from housework and internet shopping whilst the Zed Head (my baby who now has 7 teeth!!!!) is sleeping...
Saturday, December 19, 2009
What a few days!!! Wow - we have been so very busy on the house and all is - if I do say so myself - looking fabulous!! We have the curtains, bloody beautiful curtains, up in the lounge - and the room is transformed. It looks stunning and so homely now. I have bought a great new cofee table from ebay that I m ain the middle of painting the top of and will be doing the big mirroe and the other side table to match!
The gorgeous and hugely smiley Birley came over for lunch in the snow today - was a great afternoon. She is a very happy lady, has met a fab sounding chap whose name is Winston - yes, it is a huge temptation to shout WIINNNNSTAAANNNNN in a quasai Jamacian accent but hell, he sounds just perfect fpr her and I am beyond over the moon for her.. watch this space..
Only 3 more sleeps til Rigs and baby Droo arrive - oohhh cant wait! All is ready for their arrival and my wonderful husband has even booked us both in for a wash and blow dry at Toni and Guy at 12pm on Xmas eve so that we can look stunning for Xmas.. and he is not only paying but is also looking after the 3 kids! I am definately married to the most amazingly thoughtful man in the world. I love him with all that I am.....
The gorgeous and hugely smiley Birley came over for lunch in the snow today - was a great afternoon. She is a very happy lady, has met a fab sounding chap whose name is Winston - yes, it is a huge temptation to shout WIINNNNSTAAANNNNN in a quasai Jamacian accent but hell, he sounds just perfect fpr her and I am beyond over the moon for her.. watch this space..
Only 3 more sleeps til Rigs and baby Droo arrive - oohhh cant wait! All is ready for their arrival and my wonderful husband has even booked us both in for a wash and blow dry at Toni and Guy at 12pm on Xmas eve so that we can look stunning for Xmas.. and he is not only paying but is also looking after the 3 kids! I am definately married to the most amazingly thoughtful man in the world. I love him with all that I am.....
Friday, December 11, 2009
My husband snores on the sofa opposite me - so I have been in my pink place - cherrrist that sounds rude :) but I am talking about an internet forum, nowhere else!!
I feel compelled to just type down a few feelings that I would like to express -because a lot of the lovey friends I have met have experienced a miscarriage, they have lost longed for babies and that is something that I just cannot imagine. I know of my own heartache, from simply trying for a baby for so long.. and yes, it may have taken us longer second time around that we would have imagined, but we didn't lose our longed for baby. I take my hat off to all the wonderful women that I 'know' who are so bloody brave and strong after losing their babies. Life can be so cruel yet they stand up to it square in the face and beat it, most of the wonderful women I know have gone on to expand their families, yet their lost ones are never forgotton. I salute you, and I celebrate the brief time your loved ones were here.
Thank you ladies for being an inspiration, all my lots of humbling love to you all xxx
I feel compelled to just type down a few feelings that I would like to express -because a lot of the lovey friends I have met have experienced a miscarriage, they have lost longed for babies and that is something that I just cannot imagine. I know of my own heartache, from simply trying for a baby for so long.. and yes, it may have taken us longer second time around that we would have imagined, but we didn't lose our longed for baby. I take my hat off to all the wonderful women that I 'know' who are so bloody brave and strong after losing their babies. Life can be so cruel yet they stand up to it square in the face and beat it, most of the wonderful women I know have gone on to expand their families, yet their lost ones are never forgotton. I salute you, and I celebrate the brief time your loved ones were here.
Thank you ladies for being an inspiration, all my lots of humbling love to you all xxx
OK I am not giving up alcohol again - 2 weeks ago I decided to stop the wine for a few days and on day 3 I got flu! Flu so bad that I was dripping with sweat and freezing for 4 days. I haven't felt so bad for 10 years, honestly it was awful. Anyway, since I have recovered I dare not go a day without wine, and I am fighting fit!
So, now I am back to myself, I have been flat out for xmas, my cards are written and posted, my presents are all bought and mostly wrapped, the trees are up, the house is decorated (ok yes thre is more work to be done but hell I am happy with what we have so far..) the menu is sorted, the food is ordered from M&S and the itinerary is sussed. I feel so chuffed, and am so looking forward to the festivities I am buzzing!! I will miss my beautiful black cat this year though, he always loves Christmas, the heat and the merriment and the abundance of laps to kip on. My darling Flik, we will miss you every second xx
So, now I am back to myself, I have been flat out for xmas, my cards are written and posted, my presents are all bought and mostly wrapped, the trees are up, the house is decorated (ok yes thre is more work to be done but hell I am happy with what we have so far..) the menu is sorted, the food is ordered from M&S and the itinerary is sussed. I feel so chuffed, and am so looking forward to the festivities I am buzzing!! I will miss my beautiful black cat this year though, he always loves Christmas, the heat and the merriment and the abundance of laps to kip on. My darling Flik, we will miss you every second xx
Saturday, November 21, 2009
So now my life is complete - my Sister called this evening to say that she and my darling Nephew will be coming home on December the 22nd til Jan 4th. Well, I cant deny but I just cried, cried and cried, I have never felt so happy or so lucky. This year I will make a huge Xmas dinner for my beautiful sister and her son, for my Mum and Dad, the inspiration for my life and also for my incredible mother in law, whom I am in awe of every day. I have never seen her shed a tear, not even when we arrived to see her husband's last moments, nothing. elizabeth is the most amazingly strong and proud woman and she is a rock. If ever a Mother could show her love by her son she has. I am very lucky. I love that woman as if she was my own flesh and blood, I guess we have so much in common and we love Kevin unconditionally make us pretty kindred..
I am the luckiest daughter in law, I love my mother in law to bits.
I just cannot wait to have my gorgeous family around my table on christmas day,Iwant to cook a fab meal for us all and the fact that we are all going to be together is worth more than I could ever express in words.
I am the luckiest daughter in law, I love my mother in law to bits.
I just cannot wait to have my gorgeous family around my table on christmas day,Iwant to cook a fab meal for us all and the fact that we are all going to be together is worth more than I could ever express in words.
Friday, November 20, 2009
I know you have all been dying to know the results... JESS SURVIVED!! Phew, she had a stint in the washing machine and then in the freezer and is looking much better for the makeover. I am sure Teya's cough is improving already so, fingers crossed that this house will be a little less snotty from now on.
Bless Teya, she has lost 2 teeth this week and now looks extremely comedy and speaks with a lisp! Very very funny but I am gutted as have had to cancel the kid's photoshoot that I had planned for a couple of weeks time. I am sure she would not appreciate the pics in years to come. Oh god, the Christmas pictures aren't going to be as pretty as last years! Ah well, the big ones will grow soon enough, and then she will have whopping tombstones like mine no doubt..
Bless Teya, she has lost 2 teeth this week and now looks extremely comedy and speaks with a lisp! Very very funny but I am gutted as have had to cancel the kid's photoshoot that I had planned for a couple of weeks time. I am sure she would not appreciate the pics in years to come. Oh god, the Christmas pictures aren't going to be as pretty as last years! Ah well, the big ones will grow soon enough, and then she will have whopping tombstones like mine no doubt..
Wednesday, November 18, 2009
Today something very terrifying is going to occur.. I am going to put Jess in the washing machine!!
Now Jess is my daughter's pride and joy - I would give up everything I have to keep that cat and quite honestly the thought of putting her on a 40 degree spin cycle fills me with dread. The trouble is it is high time I did because my lovely GP friend thinks Jess' general filthiness could have something to do with the fact that Teya's horrible persistent cough will not budge - and that makes total sense. The cat must be full of bugs YUK as she hasnt been washed in ahem some while..
So, just before I head out to meet my bosses to discuss my flexi hours request (for another post) I shall be putting her in a pillowcase and saying a small prayer for her safe return!!
Wish me luck.. I shall report back later..
Now Jess is my daughter's pride and joy - I would give up everything I have to keep that cat and quite honestly the thought of putting her on a 40 degree spin cycle fills me with dread. The trouble is it is high time I did because my lovely GP friend thinks Jess' general filthiness could have something to do with the fact that Teya's horrible persistent cough will not budge - and that makes total sense. The cat must be full of bugs YUK as she hasnt been washed in ahem some while..
So, just before I head out to meet my bosses to discuss my flexi hours request (for another post) I shall be putting her in a pillowcase and saying a small prayer for her safe return!!
Wish me luck.. I shall report back later..
Tuesday, November 10, 2009
Enough is enough - my losing weight is getting slower and slower - so time for drastic action! I started my Davina workouts yesterday, did an hour this am and plan to run tomorrow when Mother In Law has the baby, phew, finally kicking my unfit bum in to touch.. I have to lose 1stone 2lbs by Xmas eve - but the best bit is that Janet is rising to the challenge with me, she wants a stone off to, so it is competition time...
6 weeks and 2 days to go... We will do it!
As well as that challenge Janet and I are doing the 'who can make the most on Ebay' beween now and then, and there are bonus points for selling from under the husband's noses.. what will they notice has gone?!
So, flush and thin by Christmas, woo hoo - I am ready!
6 weeks and 2 days to go... We will do it!
As well as that challenge Janet and I are doing the 'who can make the most on Ebay' beween now and then, and there are bonus points for selling from under the husband's noses.. what will they notice has gone?!
So, flush and thin by Christmas, woo hoo - I am ready!
Monday, November 09, 2009
We almost have an open fire again!!! I say almost because it is not quite finished yet but I am overly excited at the prospect of being able to satisfy my pyromaniac tendancies this weekend. The lovely Bob has knocked the fireplace back in, rendered the parts where the darling Luigi (developer) lazily stuffed in breeze blocks, and it is just the finishing round the edges to do now, which Bob is doing at 9.30am tomorrow.. I then pick up the Indian sandstone harth and we are good to go - thanks to the £20 antique fire grate picked up at Perry Hill last weekend - woo hoo - naughty nights in front of the open fire here we come.. lol
Oh, and I have to paint the chimney breast, I bought the wrong shade of Farrow and Ball, dahling, needs to be darker - but by crikey that paint is pricey!
Really looking forward to having the snug finished..
Oh, and I have to paint the chimney breast, I bought the wrong shade of Farrow and Ball, dahling, needs to be darker - but by crikey that paint is pricey!
Really looking forward to having the snug finished..
Saturday, November 07, 2009
See who couldn't love the X Factor?! As soon as the nights draw in, what would Saturday nights be without the X Factor and the heckling at the various acts? Us sitting room dwellers who cast our opinions so harshly, despite being able to hold a tune, save for the occasional drunken rendition of God Save The Queen..
Anyway, Saturdays in the Neill household are all about pizza and X Factor, we let the Spud stay up owith us but she always quaffs out early to retire to our bed with the ipod, for her Disney is waaaayy more entertaining than some wannabes on ITV.
Now, whilst I actually agree with my 5 1/2 year old, I have to state that I (we) watch the X Factor for the following reasons..
1) We love the sexual chemistry between SiCo and Chezza - they so have to do it sometime soon..
2) I have a massive girl crush on Chezza
3) Oh and on Danni too, esp as I actually asked my hairdresser to 'cut my hair like Danni's' ahhh the shame lol
4) he did cut my hair like Danni's
5) Jedward are shit but are more entertaining than Lloyd
6) Maybe Cheryl will like Danyl now that he has the same haircut as her hubby
7) Maybe she will hate him more
8) How bitchy can Louis be
So for now, we will be watching, and what crap it is... you just have to watch the Festival of Rememberance on the beeb to realise true talent. I will post about Rememberance tomorrow, something very close to my heart, but not to be typed tonight after a few bottles of vin blanc..
Anyway, Saturdays in the Neill household are all about pizza and X Factor, we let the Spud stay up owith us but she always quaffs out early to retire to our bed with the ipod, for her Disney is waaaayy more entertaining than some wannabes on ITV.
Now, whilst I actually agree with my 5 1/2 year old, I have to state that I (we) watch the X Factor for the following reasons..
1) We love the sexual chemistry between SiCo and Chezza - they so have to do it sometime soon..
2) I have a massive girl crush on Chezza
3) Oh and on Danni too, esp as I actually asked my hairdresser to 'cut my hair like Danni's' ahhh the shame lol
4) he did cut my hair like Danni's
5) Jedward are shit but are more entertaining than Lloyd
6) Maybe Cheryl will like Danyl now that he has the same haircut as her hubby
7) Maybe she will hate him more
8) How bitchy can Louis be
So for now, we will be watching, and what crap it is... you just have to watch the Festival of Rememberance on the beeb to realise true talent. I will post about Rememberance tomorrow, something very close to my heart, but not to be typed tonight after a few bottles of vin blanc..
Friday, November 06, 2009
The strangest feeling is going to collect a loved one's ashes. Today I collected my beautiful cat from the vets, well his ashes anyway, and it felt all wrong, too wrong. A week ago, my wonderful big panther cat was taken from me, hit on the road outside our new house.At 6pm he was rubbing up against my legs, later that evening, his back was broken. Thank god some local pub goers spotted him on the path as they walked home and came to our door. The doorbell rang at 9.15pm, hubby sent me to the door, wimping out of dealing with premature trick or treaters.. when I was confronted by a couple who started with the words 'do you own a black cat.......' I just knew. I screamed at Kev and ran across the road, to find my darling cat lying on the path waiting for me. He looked up at me and cried and I knew I wouldn't have him for much longer.
Kev ran out of the house after me and carried him back inside. I was hysterical, I have never felt such a searing pain for an animal. He was our first baby, he had been with Kev and I for 11 years, surely he couldnt be taken away from us now.. Kev put his hand on my sobbing shoulder.. ''he is going to die, I need to take him to the vet now, I am sorry darling....' I sat with my handsome cat for one more minute, kissing his head and crying in to his neck. He looked at me in pain and yowled. Part of me wishes he had died there in my arms. But I had to watch my husband carry him to the front seat of the car.. and I really did not want to say goodbye, but I did, despite the fact that my last words to Kev were, I am sure they will fix him, please make them fix him.
I howled and howled. Kev called me to say he had gone. He had a broken back, they had to put him down. I dont know how long I cried after that, the world went black. How bloody unfair, he was meant to be with us for sometime yet, why now? My darling Daddy called (Mum was away in Italy) Daddy was so sad too, distraught and worried about me. I didnt sleep that night, Kev came home and cuddled me but I lay awake looking at the darkness thinking of the Pirbright Panther, and how much I missed him already.
So, back to the start of this post - I picked up his ashes today, my incredible cat in an oak box with his name engraved on the top. It sits next to me now, and all I feel is an emptiness.
I havent told many people about Flik's death, I cannot bear to tell, but to those of you who know and who have been so wonderfully supportive, I thank you from the bottom of my heart.
Flik, I love you so so very much, and you will be forever in our hearts xx
I will update from the new house soon, but what with this and my horse's fractured splint bone, I have had a sad and stressful time recently, despite the joy of the new family home.
Kev ran out of the house after me and carried him back inside. I was hysterical, I have never felt such a searing pain for an animal. He was our first baby, he had been with Kev and I for 11 years, surely he couldnt be taken away from us now.. Kev put his hand on my sobbing shoulder.. ''he is going to die, I need to take him to the vet now, I am sorry darling....' I sat with my handsome cat for one more minute, kissing his head and crying in to his neck. He looked at me in pain and yowled. Part of me wishes he had died there in my arms. But I had to watch my husband carry him to the front seat of the car.. and I really did not want to say goodbye, but I did, despite the fact that my last words to Kev were, I am sure they will fix him, please make them fix him.
I howled and howled. Kev called me to say he had gone. He had a broken back, they had to put him down. I dont know how long I cried after that, the world went black. How bloody unfair, he was meant to be with us for sometime yet, why now? My darling Daddy called (Mum was away in Italy) Daddy was so sad too, distraught and worried about me. I didnt sleep that night, Kev came home and cuddled me but I lay awake looking at the darkness thinking of the Pirbright Panther, and how much I missed him already.
So, back to the start of this post - I picked up his ashes today, my incredible cat in an oak box with his name engraved on the top. It sits next to me now, and all I feel is an emptiness.
I havent told many people about Flik's death, I cannot bear to tell, but to those of you who know and who have been so wonderfully supportive, I thank you from the bottom of my heart.
Flik, I love you so so very much, and you will be forever in our hearts xx
I will update from the new house soon, but what with this and my horse's fractured splint bone, I have had a sad and stressful time recently, despite the joy of the new family home.
Thursday, October 08, 2009
It is actually official that I am rubbish at updating this blog. For anyone who is still reading, thank you for your patience, I have been shit I know.
So, here I am, inspired to write because tonight friends is the last night that I will be spending in my beautiful 2 bedroom cottage on Gole Road. This house has been the making if me, corny as it sounds it is beautiful and as it was my first huge purchase, it will always be the closest to my heart. My daughter has spent her early childhood here and we have grown as a family in this house. Dont get me wrong it xertainly hasnt been plain happy smug sailing, if fact I have had some dark times here BUT they were a long time ago and the house has evolved with us as a family since then. This place is truely beautiful and i feel so priviliged that when friends walk through the door they always remark on the feel and atmosphere of the place. Pretty incredible for a house that is over 100 years old. Thank you house, I will forever hold a special place in my heart for you, and I wish James and Lisa as much love and happiness from you as we have had.
Anyway, I am around boxes and without my baby (MIL is looking after him!!!) so am taking advantage and will get an early night.
I look forward to updating you from Gole Cottage.
Here's to the next chapter..
xx
So, here I am, inspired to write because tonight friends is the last night that I will be spending in my beautiful 2 bedroom cottage on Gole Road. This house has been the making if me, corny as it sounds it is beautiful and as it was my first huge purchase, it will always be the closest to my heart. My daughter has spent her early childhood here and we have grown as a family in this house. Dont get me wrong it xertainly hasnt been plain happy smug sailing, if fact I have had some dark times here BUT they were a long time ago and the house has evolved with us as a family since then. This place is truely beautiful and i feel so priviliged that when friends walk through the door they always remark on the feel and atmosphere of the place. Pretty incredible for a house that is over 100 years old. Thank you house, I will forever hold a special place in my heart for you, and I wish James and Lisa as much love and happiness from you as we have had.
Anyway, I am around boxes and without my baby (MIL is looking after him!!!) so am taking advantage and will get an early night.
I look forward to updating you from Gole Cottage.
Here's to the next chapter..
xx
Wednesday, August 12, 2009
What a couple of days I have had! OK, so I know I have been wholly rubbish at updating my blog, so am going to try and make the proper effort to do so daily for a while..
So, Monday started with the joyous news that there was still a dispute at the council regarding the planning permission/ building works on our new house. Great, we are supposed to move on Thursday (ie TOMORROW!) and still this had not been sorted, and we were awaiting a decision from the planning officer.. joy.
My Audi was also due to be collected on Monday, but DH kindly announced that the clutch had gone on Saturday (at 46K miles, I was livid, gosh he is a crap driver!!!) so it couldnt be collected and instead we had to get it to the garage up the road and pay a non collection fee! Expensive day.
Yesterday I find out that the move is off, at least for now - there was no planning permission granted for part of the rear extension in our new place - I couldnt believe it! Now whilst the council say that they are not opposed, who knows what this parish might say, so we have agreed to sit tight and wait for the retrospective planning is approved, and just pray that it is. Incredibly, my seller seems to think that this is unreasonable and wants us to exchange anyway, with a retension, not something I am comfortable with - so we wait! How anyone who blatently disregarded the planning permission can have such an opinion is beyond me! Thank goodness our lovely buyers are happy to wait, and so are theirs. GAH this has to be the worst house move in history.
Zach is also rapidly outgrowing the moses basket and I have started weaning him - the boy is a hoover! Loves his food, in typical male style. No way can Kev and I fit the cot in our room with us so I really do hope the planning doesnt take too long.. but who knows.
I am now just sitting down with a well deserved glass of wine after scrubbing my house from top to bottom with the help of my fabulous Mum, it looks fantastic.
So, Monday started with the joyous news that there was still a dispute at the council regarding the planning permission/ building works on our new house. Great, we are supposed to move on Thursday (ie TOMORROW!) and still this had not been sorted, and we were awaiting a decision from the planning officer.. joy.
My Audi was also due to be collected on Monday, but DH kindly announced that the clutch had gone on Saturday (at 46K miles, I was livid, gosh he is a crap driver!!!) so it couldnt be collected and instead we had to get it to the garage up the road and pay a non collection fee! Expensive day.
Yesterday I find out that the move is off, at least for now - there was no planning permission granted for part of the rear extension in our new place - I couldnt believe it! Now whilst the council say that they are not opposed, who knows what this parish might say, so we have agreed to sit tight and wait for the retrospective planning is approved, and just pray that it is. Incredibly, my seller seems to think that this is unreasonable and wants us to exchange anyway, with a retension, not something I am comfortable with - so we wait! How anyone who blatently disregarded the planning permission can have such an opinion is beyond me! Thank goodness our lovely buyers are happy to wait, and so are theirs. GAH this has to be the worst house move in history.
Zach is also rapidly outgrowing the moses basket and I have started weaning him - the boy is a hoover! Loves his food, in typical male style. No way can Kev and I fit the cot in our room with us so I really do hope the planning doesnt take too long.. but who knows.
I am now just sitting down with a well deserved glass of wine after scrubbing my house from top to bottom with the help of my fabulous Mum, it looks fantastic.
Thursday, May 14, 2009
Finally, we have decided on a name! Zach Benjamin Rufus John :) I have even been to register his birth so it is official. I am so so happy with my little man, he is an absolute treasure and makes me feel so very lucky and complete. Teya is being a fantastic big sister too, she is really helpful despite being as demanding as ever herself hee hee, and she has so much love for her baby bunny as she calls him, it melts my heart.
Happy 32nd wedding anniversary to the Rentals! Gosh 32 years, and they are still in love and an inspiration to all couples out there. I couldn't function without the love and support of my wonderful parents, so here is a huge thank you and lots of love from me.. Not that they will ever see this - but it is feels right to mark the occasion. I have always aspired to have a marriage like theirs, and I do hope I will be as good an example to my children as they have been to my Sister and I.
Talking of my Mum, we were in town yesterday doing some shopping and a potter about - Zach was in his car seat as I couldnt be arsed with the buggy (and he looks beyond tiny in it!) and Mum had the joy of lugging him about as I am still feeling rather ouch from the c section. Anyway, it was amazing how many people stopped us to coo over the baby, yet even more amazing that most actually assumed he was MUM'S!! I mean I know I still have the face of a teenager, but my Mum is 54 FFS!! It was so very funny.
Happy 32nd wedding anniversary to the Rentals! Gosh 32 years, and they are still in love and an inspiration to all couples out there. I couldn't function without the love and support of my wonderful parents, so here is a huge thank you and lots of love from me.. Not that they will ever see this - but it is feels right to mark the occasion. I have always aspired to have a marriage like theirs, and I do hope I will be as good an example to my children as they have been to my Sister and I.
Talking of my Mum, we were in town yesterday doing some shopping and a potter about - Zach was in his car seat as I couldnt be arsed with the buggy (and he looks beyond tiny in it!) and Mum had the joy of lugging him about as I am still feeling rather ouch from the c section. Anyway, it was amazing how many people stopped us to coo over the baby, yet even more amazing that most actually assumed he was MUM'S!! I mean I know I still have the face of a teenager, but my Mum is 54 FFS!! It was so very funny.
Monday, April 27, 2009
Our Boy is here!!! Zach (middle names still undecided!!) was born at 0941 on Tuesday 21st April at Frimley Park Hospital in Surrey. To say that we are all ecstatic and completely in love with him would be an understatement. I am currently still feeling rather like an unfortunate extra from a slasher movie, but am still smiling and shuffling about so I thought I had better get his birth story down in writing before full on nappy brain and sleep deprivation take over and I forget it all.
Our story begins slightly ahead of schedule, on Monday 20th April at around 8pm.
Everything was ready for baby boy's arrival, I had cleaned and tidied to within an inch of my life, all the beds were changed, the clothes for Teya laid out for her Dad and Granny, the fridge stocked with food, my hospital bag done, the moses basket in place, bod was shaved and prepped and all ready to be scrutinised under theatre lights. Kev and I had decided to order a fancy indian takeaway and have a small glass of wine, before settling down to watch Hells Kitchen and then get an early night. Ha the best laid plans and all that.. At around 8pm and just before the curry arrived I got up to go for my umpteenth wee of the day, nothing untoward about that - until I realised that this wee was quite different, there was blood present. Staying calm I came out of the bathroom and told Kev, who immediately looked panicked (an expression that became etched permanantly on my poor hubby's face for the next 24 hours!) I said not to panic and called the maternity ward - they asked if there was a lot of blood, I said no, they then asked if I had any contractions, again no. Phew, I was to rest up at home and call again if anything changed - if it didnt I would see them in the morning.
About halfway through the curry I felt it - oh yes it may be 5 years since the last one but you do not forget what a contraction feels like !! I asked Kev to get timing, 10 minutes and pang another one. How sodding typical, the night before I am due to have my baby taken out of me and he has other ideas! So, back on the phone and an hour later, my Mum has arrived to look after the blissfully unaware Teya, I have burst in to tears due to the blasted hormones and we have arrived at the central delivery suite. After being strapped up to the monitor and having a rather rough handed consultant shove his paw up my fandangoo (thankfully this time round that is the last time my girlie bits get any tampering with!) it is pronounced that yes indeed I am in labour, but my cervix is only very slightly open, and with no head down to speed the process up they dont think they will need to operate that night. Crikey. Then much to my dismay my poor scared hubby is sent off home and I am taken to the ante natal ward - just in case my waters go in the night. Boo. Not the way I had planned to spend my last night as a Mummy of one - I was hoping for a long cuddle with my hubs in our clean tidy bedroom, and what do I get instead? A room with 6 other heavily pregnant snoring groaning women, one of whom was in early labour and sounded as though she was orgasming her way through the night, much to the disgust of the woman next to her who huffed puffed and tutted the whole night through! I dont know which disturbance was more condusive to my lack of sleep, but needless to say when Kev arrived at 6am the next morning I was exhausted.
Anyway, on to the actual story! At around 7.30am the Midwife came in to see us and brought Kev his scrubs, my gowns and sexy stockings and talked us through the schedule of events for the next few hours. We both changed in silence, loaded up our empty cot with vest, hat, babygro and camera and then sat back to chat and wait our turn to be called. Turns out we didnt have to wait too much longer, at 8.30 we were collected and walked across the hospital with our cot full of paraphenallia - me as white as the hospital walls and Kev quieter than I have ever known him. The young maternity assistant who walked us down couldnt have been a day over 18 but she was so calm and lovely, in fact I would just like to take this opportunity to say that all of the staff who looked after us all during our time at Frimley Park were absolutely fantastic. So, at 9am we arrived at the theatre and by this time I am so bloody scared I could be sick. The theatre staff welcomed us through the scarily official looking doors and completed all of their checks. I sat up on the bed shaking like a leaf and trying not to look at Kev who looked as though he was about to cry. The anaethatist nummed my back with a local whilst the girls all made small talk to occupy me, but all I could think was 'i really dont want to do this - but i have no sodding choice' the fear of the unknown is hugely powerful and I can honestly say that I havent felt so scared for as long as I can remember. The anaethatist put the spinal in and first time hit a nerve so my back involuntarily spasmed - god that was horrid, but the second time she did it it went painlessly in and I felt a rush of warmth all down my left side 'Is this supposed to feel as though I am peeing in a wetsuit?!' i ask - laughter ensued and indeed, it was agreed that yes the two feelings were very similar. Very quickly I began to lose feeling in my legs and they tested out the level of sensation by spraying me with a cold spray. I really cant begin to describe what it feels like, you can feel everything - every touch, the pressure but NO PAIN AT ALL. When they put the catheter in I was convinced that would feel uncomfy but nope, not a thing. So odd, and so not pleasant. I hate to feel out of control - christ I dont even like to have anaesthetic before a filling so being partially paralysed was not good for me.
Once the staff were happy that I was suitably numb I was wheeled in to the brightly lit theatre and it was all systems go. My gown was hitched up and pinned on arms in front of my face to make the 'screen' Kev sat next to me as the surgeon began - I felt the tugs and pulls for what seemed like an eternity - Kev held my hand and watched as much as he could bear in the reflection from the light above my head - he gripped my hand tightly as I started to cry - I felt sick and I wanted my baby - the anaethatist tried to calm me down and added what felt like 2 litres of anti nausea drugs to my IV - where was my baby? At 0941 Kev started to cry as he saw our son lifeted from my tummy, I kept repeating 'is he OK is he OK?' and the next thing I remember is hearing my baby cry for the first time and everyone rushing to reassure and congratulate us, and both of our tears of tension and fear turned immediately to immense relief and euphoria. I was then handed my beautiful (if very purple!) baby in a towel and I held on to him as tightly as I could manage, I then felt the tugging as I was stitched up and passed him to his Daddy for his first cuddle. Wow, we did it - terrified and feeling quite frankly horrendous despite the lack of pain we were wheeled in to recovery where my beautiful baby Zach was placed on my naked chest for pretty much the whole time. I didnt even notice when my blood pressure dropped so low that the crash team were put on standby.. Nothing really felt real - the only thing that I could think about was how incredibly lucky I was to be holding my beautiful, perfect and longed for baby boy.
Well done if you have got this far! It was a bit of an epic and I am crying now as I finish writing this. Honestly the emotion of the whole experience has been overwhelming and I am so glad that it is all over and we are home safe and well. I was in hospital until the Thursday morning and was glad to get home to my gorgeous family, all of whom have been incredible.
Just a last note before I finish, now that I can say I have experience of the two opposite ends of the birth spectrum (if there is such a thing) if anyone wants my opinion as to which to go for, the no pain relief, full labour and natural memphis belle bomb doors or the sunroof option? Given the choice, it would be the bomb doors everytime. Oh and incedentally, the consultant who delivered Zach was the same chap who booked me in for the c section - the one who acted as though he didnt quite believe my midwife for saying Zach was breech - well after the operation he informed us that even if all had been normal and baby was head down, the umbillical cord was too short and my labour would have ended in c section anyway...
Welcome to the world Zach, words cannot describe how much we all adore you already.
Our story begins slightly ahead of schedule, on Monday 20th April at around 8pm.
Everything was ready for baby boy's arrival, I had cleaned and tidied to within an inch of my life, all the beds were changed, the clothes for Teya laid out for her Dad and Granny, the fridge stocked with food, my hospital bag done, the moses basket in place, bod was shaved and prepped and all ready to be scrutinised under theatre lights. Kev and I had decided to order a fancy indian takeaway and have a small glass of wine, before settling down to watch Hells Kitchen and then get an early night. Ha the best laid plans and all that.. At around 8pm and just before the curry arrived I got up to go for my umpteenth wee of the day, nothing untoward about that - until I realised that this wee was quite different, there was blood present. Staying calm I came out of the bathroom and told Kev, who immediately looked panicked (an expression that became etched permanantly on my poor hubby's face for the next 24 hours!) I said not to panic and called the maternity ward - they asked if there was a lot of blood, I said no, they then asked if I had any contractions, again no. Phew, I was to rest up at home and call again if anything changed - if it didnt I would see them in the morning.
About halfway through the curry I felt it - oh yes it may be 5 years since the last one but you do not forget what a contraction feels like !! I asked Kev to get timing, 10 minutes and pang another one. How sodding typical, the night before I am due to have my baby taken out of me and he has other ideas! So, back on the phone and an hour later, my Mum has arrived to look after the blissfully unaware Teya, I have burst in to tears due to the blasted hormones and we have arrived at the central delivery suite. After being strapped up to the monitor and having a rather rough handed consultant shove his paw up my fandangoo (thankfully this time round that is the last time my girlie bits get any tampering with!) it is pronounced that yes indeed I am in labour, but my cervix is only very slightly open, and with no head down to speed the process up they dont think they will need to operate that night. Crikey. Then much to my dismay my poor scared hubby is sent off home and I am taken to the ante natal ward - just in case my waters go in the night. Boo. Not the way I had planned to spend my last night as a Mummy of one - I was hoping for a long cuddle with my hubs in our clean tidy bedroom, and what do I get instead? A room with 6 other heavily pregnant snoring groaning women, one of whom was in early labour and sounded as though she was orgasming her way through the night, much to the disgust of the woman next to her who huffed puffed and tutted the whole night through! I dont know which disturbance was more condusive to my lack of sleep, but needless to say when Kev arrived at 6am the next morning I was exhausted.
Anyway, on to the actual story! At around 7.30am the Midwife came in to see us and brought Kev his scrubs, my gowns and sexy stockings and talked us through the schedule of events for the next few hours. We both changed in silence, loaded up our empty cot with vest, hat, babygro and camera and then sat back to chat and wait our turn to be called. Turns out we didnt have to wait too much longer, at 8.30 we were collected and walked across the hospital with our cot full of paraphenallia - me as white as the hospital walls and Kev quieter than I have ever known him. The young maternity assistant who walked us down couldnt have been a day over 18 but she was so calm and lovely, in fact I would just like to take this opportunity to say that all of the staff who looked after us all during our time at Frimley Park were absolutely fantastic. So, at 9am we arrived at the theatre and by this time I am so bloody scared I could be sick. The theatre staff welcomed us through the scarily official looking doors and completed all of their checks. I sat up on the bed shaking like a leaf and trying not to look at Kev who looked as though he was about to cry. The anaethatist nummed my back with a local whilst the girls all made small talk to occupy me, but all I could think was 'i really dont want to do this - but i have no sodding choice' the fear of the unknown is hugely powerful and I can honestly say that I havent felt so scared for as long as I can remember. The anaethatist put the spinal in and first time hit a nerve so my back involuntarily spasmed - god that was horrid, but the second time she did it it went painlessly in and I felt a rush of warmth all down my left side 'Is this supposed to feel as though I am peeing in a wetsuit?!' i ask - laughter ensued and indeed, it was agreed that yes the two feelings were very similar. Very quickly I began to lose feeling in my legs and they tested out the level of sensation by spraying me with a cold spray. I really cant begin to describe what it feels like, you can feel everything - every touch, the pressure but NO PAIN AT ALL. When they put the catheter in I was convinced that would feel uncomfy but nope, not a thing. So odd, and so not pleasant. I hate to feel out of control - christ I dont even like to have anaesthetic before a filling so being partially paralysed was not good for me.
Once the staff were happy that I was suitably numb I was wheeled in to the brightly lit theatre and it was all systems go. My gown was hitched up and pinned on arms in front of my face to make the 'screen' Kev sat next to me as the surgeon began - I felt the tugs and pulls for what seemed like an eternity - Kev held my hand and watched as much as he could bear in the reflection from the light above my head - he gripped my hand tightly as I started to cry - I felt sick and I wanted my baby - the anaethatist tried to calm me down and added what felt like 2 litres of anti nausea drugs to my IV - where was my baby? At 0941 Kev started to cry as he saw our son lifeted from my tummy, I kept repeating 'is he OK is he OK?' and the next thing I remember is hearing my baby cry for the first time and everyone rushing to reassure and congratulate us, and both of our tears of tension and fear turned immediately to immense relief and euphoria. I was then handed my beautiful (if very purple!) baby in a towel and I held on to him as tightly as I could manage, I then felt the tugging as I was stitched up and passed him to his Daddy for his first cuddle. Wow, we did it - terrified and feeling quite frankly horrendous despite the lack of pain we were wheeled in to recovery where my beautiful baby Zach was placed on my naked chest for pretty much the whole time. I didnt even notice when my blood pressure dropped so low that the crash team were put on standby.. Nothing really felt real - the only thing that I could think about was how incredibly lucky I was to be holding my beautiful, perfect and longed for baby boy.
Well done if you have got this far! It was a bit of an epic and I am crying now as I finish writing this. Honestly the emotion of the whole experience has been overwhelming and I am so glad that it is all over and we are home safe and well. I was in hospital until the Thursday morning and was glad to get home to my gorgeous family, all of whom have been incredible.
Just a last note before I finish, now that I can say I have experience of the two opposite ends of the birth spectrum (if there is such a thing) if anyone wants my opinion as to which to go for, the no pain relief, full labour and natural memphis belle bomb doors or the sunroof option? Given the choice, it would be the bomb doors everytime. Oh and incedentally, the consultant who delivered Zach was the same chap who booked me in for the c section - the one who acted as though he didnt quite believe my midwife for saying Zach was breech - well after the operation he informed us that even if all had been normal and baby was head down, the umbillical cord was too short and my labour would have ended in c section anyway...
Welcome to the world Zach, words cannot describe how much we all adore you already.
Sunday, April 19, 2009
Ah the joys of hospitals! On Thursday I had my pre op appointment to discuss all the ins and outs (pardon the pun!) of my c section. So, 15 minutes before my scheduled appointment time, Teya and I made our way to the hospital, her announcing that it looked like 'Scrubs' inside, and over to the waiting room at the ante natal clinic, to sit and patiently wait to be seen along with numerous other couples/women/ families from all over the county.
One thing that I continue to find fascinating is the sheer variety of carachters that one sees when in such a place as an NHS hospital. People watching, I am sure everyone agrees, is a thoroughly fascinating passtime - and happily for me, I got to spend quite sometime doing it due to the fact that my appointment was so delayed.
As Teya and I sat we were joined in the waiting room by a variety of sights, from all walks of life - to my left were a veringontheelderley hippie couple, she who kept grumbling that they were having to wait, and him who just looked bemused at the whole experience. To my right an Umbro shorts and matching tracksuit top and trainers combo chap and his Thai bride, him looking frankly pretty ugly but rather pleased with himself, and her rather resembling a rabbit in headlights, who almost looked as though she couldnt quite grasp what was going on. Across from me were the stereotypical chav family, brash noisy large goldearring wearing grandmother grappling 3 snotty nosed kids whose ages varied from around 1 -4 while the mother heaved her none so small frame around the room looking bored and uncomfortable, but totally oblivious to her children's behaviour.
Over in the far corner of the room were a couple who were clearly on their first child, probably at around the 20 week mark looking at her little bump, who sat very quietly, husband with hand on pretty wife's knee, looking around them in horror at (well in particular the 3 I have just mentioned) kids racing around the room - almost in disbelief that this might be something they had signed themselves up for! Lastly over in the other corner sat a very large and very young girl, having a very loud and not so intelligent arguement with her camo clad boyfriend , who proceeded to get up and leave halfway through her verbal attack.
I was eventually seen after about an hour, firstly having my weight and other vitals taken by the midwife, baby boy was checked and my urine sample screened (much to Teya's disgust!) Next it was on to see the anaethatist (sp?) to discuss the implications of the spinal, and the details of the operation itself, all of which I will spare you here you will be happy to hear. I was also given pre op meds to be taken the night before the section, and the very sweet chap advised me not to drink any thing past 10pm that night - no problem say I - and then felt the ground open up before me as my daughter announces that 'well Mummy drinks wine in bed!' to which both the anaethatist (who couldnt have been a day over 25) and I blushed a deep shade of purple whilst I tried to protest that actually at 9 months pregnant I don't.. but out of the mouth's of babes hey?! She seemed pretty pleased with herself, and I left 30 minutes later after having more blood extracted and generally feeling more terrified than I have done to date.. No matter what, this boy is coming out feet first on Tuesday 21st April!! As we left the building Teya looked up at me and announced that she didn't want to have a baby taken out of her tummy - ever - so she would NOT be getting married, end of story.. Awww - I shall have great pleasure recounting that story in years to come...
One thing that I continue to find fascinating is the sheer variety of carachters that one sees when in such a place as an NHS hospital. People watching, I am sure everyone agrees, is a thoroughly fascinating passtime - and happily for me, I got to spend quite sometime doing it due to the fact that my appointment was so delayed.
As Teya and I sat we were joined in the waiting room by a variety of sights, from all walks of life - to my left were a veringontheelderley hippie couple, she who kept grumbling that they were having to wait, and him who just looked bemused at the whole experience. To my right an Umbro shorts and matching tracksuit top and trainers combo chap and his Thai bride, him looking frankly pretty ugly but rather pleased with himself, and her rather resembling a rabbit in headlights, who almost looked as though she couldnt quite grasp what was going on. Across from me were the stereotypical chav family, brash noisy large goldearring wearing grandmother grappling 3 snotty nosed kids whose ages varied from around 1 -4 while the mother heaved her none so small frame around the room looking bored and uncomfortable, but totally oblivious to her children's behaviour.
Over in the far corner of the room were a couple who were clearly on their first child, probably at around the 20 week mark looking at her little bump, who sat very quietly, husband with hand on pretty wife's knee, looking around them in horror at (well in particular the 3 I have just mentioned) kids racing around the room - almost in disbelief that this might be something they had signed themselves up for! Lastly over in the other corner sat a very large and very young girl, having a very loud and not so intelligent arguement with her camo clad boyfriend , who proceeded to get up and leave halfway through her verbal attack.
I was eventually seen after about an hour, firstly having my weight and other vitals taken by the midwife, baby boy was checked and my urine sample screened (much to Teya's disgust!) Next it was on to see the anaethatist (sp?) to discuss the implications of the spinal, and the details of the operation itself, all of which I will spare you here you will be happy to hear. I was also given pre op meds to be taken the night before the section, and the very sweet chap advised me not to drink any thing past 10pm that night - no problem say I - and then felt the ground open up before me as my daughter announces that 'well Mummy drinks wine in bed!' to which both the anaethatist (who couldnt have been a day over 25) and I blushed a deep shade of purple whilst I tried to protest that actually at 9 months pregnant I don't.. but out of the mouth's of babes hey?! She seemed pretty pleased with herself, and I left 30 minutes later after having more blood extracted and generally feeling more terrified than I have done to date.. No matter what, this boy is coming out feet first on Tuesday 21st April!! As we left the building Teya looked up at me and announced that she didn't want to have a baby taken out of her tummy - ever - so she would NOT be getting married, end of story.. Awww - I shall have great pleasure recounting that story in years to come...
Tuesday, April 14, 2009
Count down to baby boy's arrival has begun!
Last Thursday afternoon I tentatively made my way over to Frimley Park hospital to discuss the next steps for Baby Boy's birth. The long and the short of it was that after a brief scan to determine that yes the baby is still breech (I was rather under the impression that the consultant didn't 'believe' my Midwife's observations, and also that I rather regarded myself as a yummy Mummy who was too posh to push...) but yes, if I was not keen on trying the ECV, which I am not due to the fact that my Midwife has said that she is unsure how sucessful it would be given the boy's comfort and also that at any complication an emergency C will be undertaken, I should be booked in for a C Section at 39 weeks. The con called to his colleages for the 'Section Diary' and within a couple of seconds a tatty A4 collins-a-like book was thrust in to his hands, and the date of the 21st April was turned to. This was the first date without a myriad of white stickers (the high tech way in which the NHS differentiate between the 'patients') so I was 'stuck' in! I then had to sign a rather scarily detailed consent form, which listed all of the possible complications with the procedure - before being sent on my way, clutching my notes and an equally scary leaflet all about what to expect from your elective c- section.
So, as I type I am still rather in denial about the fact that this time next week, I will God willing, have my baby boy in my arms. I am both over excited and highly terrified about the whole thing, but mostly I am just going to enjoy the last few days of being just Teya's Mummy and the rest of her Easter holiday. My to do list is, with the odd exception, all done - and we are all ready for the beginning of the summer term and for the start of our next chaper...
Last Thursday afternoon I tentatively made my way over to Frimley Park hospital to discuss the next steps for Baby Boy's birth. The long and the short of it was that after a brief scan to determine that yes the baby is still breech (I was rather under the impression that the consultant didn't 'believe' my Midwife's observations, and also that I rather regarded myself as a yummy Mummy who was too posh to push...) but yes, if I was not keen on trying the ECV, which I am not due to the fact that my Midwife has said that she is unsure how sucessful it would be given the boy's comfort and also that at any complication an emergency C will be undertaken, I should be booked in for a C Section at 39 weeks. The con called to his colleages for the 'Section Diary' and within a couple of seconds a tatty A4 collins-a-like book was thrust in to his hands, and the date of the 21st April was turned to. This was the first date without a myriad of white stickers (the high tech way in which the NHS differentiate between the 'patients') so I was 'stuck' in! I then had to sign a rather scarily detailed consent form, which listed all of the possible complications with the procedure - before being sent on my way, clutching my notes and an equally scary leaflet all about what to expect from your elective c- section.
So, as I type I am still rather in denial about the fact that this time next week, I will God willing, have my baby boy in my arms. I am both over excited and highly terrified about the whole thing, but mostly I am just going to enjoy the last few days of being just Teya's Mummy and the rest of her Easter holiday. My to do list is, with the odd exception, all done - and we are all ready for the beginning of the summer term and for the start of our next chaper...
Wednesday, April 01, 2009
Death of a Motorcyclist
Those of you who know where I live know how notorious this road can be for people speeding, but for those who don't, I am lucky enough to live in a very pretty village, but one of the drawbacks is that the bikers love it too.. it is a great area to ride around..
Not that I am saying that in itself is a bad thing, but it is a 40 MPH road yet no motorcyclist ever seems to go below 80, they can go round the first corner then it is about 1/2 mile straight past my row of cottages and they bomb it down here.
Today has been a beautiful warm spring day, I almost had the hood down, but wasn't actually driving far so didnt bother! Around 2.30pm I was driving back from the post office, ebay run, turned the aforementioned corner and was met with a scary sight. A biker had misjudged his line (I guessed) and there was a lot of debris across the road.. cue 10 minutes later the air was filled with sirens, the area was cordened off by police and the air ambulance arrived. It didnt leave in a hurry, and I overheard one of the policemen remarking, as he made his way back to the car, that as that was now the 4th fatality in under a year, maybe the council would lower the speed limit.
It is tragic, I hate the way the bikers speed down my road yes, but even worse than that I hate to see the piles of tribute flowers a few days later. It breaks my heart, I just wish they would take more care, but i guess that even with lowering the limits, that will never happen. Who buys a bike to drive about at 30MPH? Sadly, no one.
Those of you who know where I live know how notorious this road can be for people speeding, but for those who don't, I am lucky enough to live in a very pretty village, but one of the drawbacks is that the bikers love it too.. it is a great area to ride around..
Not that I am saying that in itself is a bad thing, but it is a 40 MPH road yet no motorcyclist ever seems to go below 80, they can go round the first corner then it is about 1/2 mile straight past my row of cottages and they bomb it down here.
Today has been a beautiful warm spring day, I almost had the hood down, but wasn't actually driving far so didnt bother! Around 2.30pm I was driving back from the post office, ebay run, turned the aforementioned corner and was met with a scary sight. A biker had misjudged his line (I guessed) and there was a lot of debris across the road.. cue 10 minutes later the air was filled with sirens, the area was cordened off by police and the air ambulance arrived. It didnt leave in a hurry, and I overheard one of the policemen remarking, as he made his way back to the car, that as that was now the 4th fatality in under a year, maybe the council would lower the speed limit.
It is tragic, I hate the way the bikers speed down my road yes, but even worse than that I hate to see the piles of tribute flowers a few days later. It breaks my heart, I just wish they would take more care, but i guess that even with lowering the limits, that will never happen. Who buys a bike to drive about at 30MPH? Sadly, no one.
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